Appliance love

My neighbor was away for over a month.  I had told her that I would be buying a ventless washer/dryer combination in preparation for the arrival of Baby x.  She took it in stride, which was a relief because she’s technically the super (or a super). 

On Friday, I told her that the plumber would be coming on Saturday to have a look around.  She said, “That reminds me—instead of putting the washer in the back room near your bathroom, why don’t you put it next to the sink and move the refrigerator.”

BRILLIANCE!  I never would have thought of this plan.  For the 19 years I’ve lived in my apt, the fridge has been in the same place.  So although it isn’t bolted down, in my mind it IS immutable.  But I have plenty of space for it elsewhere in the kitchen.

Supposedly the plumber will come back sometime in the second half of the month (I’m supposed to call him over the weekend to set something up).  He has to putting in a water hook-up for the illegal, illicit machine, which I expect to buy sometime in November.  I’m looking forward to the machine even though I know ventless dryers take a long time and leave you with wrinkled clothes.  But you know what?  It’s been 20 years since I lived in the same building with a washer and dryer and I’m looking forward to having it at my disposal.  It’s my belated 40^th bday present from my mother and (ex)step-father and I think it’ll be a lovely addition.

Singular sensation

I have two pregnancy related potential sagas going on today—the work/time off saga and the childbirth class dilemma.

At work, I spoke with my boss about the rule that prevents those of us who aren’t at least 80% gr@nt funded (I’m at 68%) from carrying 0ver the time off we accrue in 2009 to 2010.  If we had days left from 2008 we can carry over THOSE days—in my case, that is 5 days.

My boss asked me to write a memo to her and then SHE wrote a memo to her bosses (the prez and the COO) to ask them to make an exception to the rule.  I’m hoping to hear next week whether I’ll be able to take those days next week as part of my time off or whether I’ll be stuck with an extra 2 weeks of disability pay (@$210 per week).  My best case scenario is to have saved a total of 4 weeks and then to take the other 9 weeks as disability.  I know that there are many people who have it worse, but this seems to be a sorry state of affairs for a maternal/child health organization.  My mother’s friend’s daughter, who lives a couple of miles from me, gets EIGHT PAID MONTHS of maternity leave.  She works for Am’sty Intl.

The upcoming saga is childbirth classes.  There is no scarcity or them in my neighborhood, but I’m not sure that I want to take a CB class with 5 straight 20-something couples.  There is also a lot of focus in these classes on what the “partner/husband’s” role is and I don’t need to pay money to sit through something that is irrelevant to me.

I looked through the archives of the single mothers group and found that many singles take private or semi-private classes so that they know that the content of the classes is relevant. I’m debating whether to try to find another single mother-to-be to take the class with me or whether to spring for 6 or 8 hours of classes on my own.   

So those are my concerns of the moment, in addition to trying to get a plumber who will be able to install a washing machine hookup.  But that’s a story for later.

Gasoline

Crazy people came to my neighborhood over the weekend with their God Hates Fags/God Hates Jews signs.  Apparently they were scheduled to go to St Patrick’s because God also “hates pedophiles.”

There is a great account of the events here.  I love the photo of the ugly dog with the sign.

I was upset in advance about the arrival of the Evil Westboro as they were interrupting a young girl’s Bat Mitzvah.  I was walking to meet a friend at the time and found myself worrying that one of the young girl’s relatives might be a holocaust survivor…so of course I started to cry.  It’s important to cry at these times.

I wish I could say that I felt strongly about the 1st amendment on Saturday, but I didn’t.  I was thinking more of the 3rd commandment, “You shall not make wrongful use of the name of your God.” 

That’s not true…I was really dreaming that someone would toss gasoline and set the GodHatesJews folks on fire.  So much for Peace and Love.

I WIN–a subway rant

This morning I got on the F train which was crowded but not THAT crowded for a rush hour.  I looked around and saw that in one of the seat units intended for three, there was a space in the middle.  The tiny woman on the left side of the seats saw me coming and tried to make herself EVEN smaller.  The guy on the right side, who looked to weigh maybe 140 lbs soaking wet ignored me and kept his legs spread ALLTHEWAYOUT, presumably to display his tiny cojones.

So I did what I always do–I kicked his foot with my sneakers and sat down.  He was clearly distressed. He had just taken a book about Jazz in the 1980s out of his bag.  But he didn’t crack it open. He spent the next five stops, until I got off, looking around for another seat.  As I exited the train, I saw him relax and crack open the book.  I’m so powerful.

If you’re wondering why I didn’t say “excuse me,” it’s because I’ve found that politeness gives them too much time to open their legs wider. I’ve gained 10 lbs in the past 2 months, I’m pregnant, I get to sit down, and if tiny rude white men don’t like it, let them learn some manners.

On the counter

My mom is feeling better now that she is working 3 or 4 days per week instead of one day.  The following e-mail illustrates her good mood:

So I got to the store this morning.  L— had already been there and was out galivanting around town.  There was a dildo on the counter. 

Oops, it was a big summer squash that L–had just picked from her garden in the morning and was giving it to me.

Oy vey.  What did I do to deserve this?  It’s nice to have my twisted mother back, though.

Shove the ball down your throat

Everyone is tired of this story but me.  I was watching the tennis live on ESPN and saw the “incident” with Serena Williams.  According to the lines person, Serena committed a foot fault (her foot was not 100% behind the line during her serve).  When the lineswoman called her for the foot fault, Serena went over and started to berate her.  I would have berated her also for such a bullshit call (video on the foot fault is inconclusive.)  Apparently Serena told the woman that she was lucky that she didn’t shove the ball down her throat.  “I swear to God, I’ll f— take this ball and shove it down your f— throat…”

For her behavior, Serena was docked a point and that point happened to be match point, so she lost.

According to the NY Daily News: Meanwhile, the lineswoman who made the call – the USTA declined to reveal her name – was having a hard time moving forward, according to a USTA official who saw her after the match and said it was not a pretty picture.

The poor woman was so upset that she looked like she was going to faint. The other linespeople were comforting her, but she looked very shaken.

Many people, including Mary Carillo, the announcer, want Serena to be suspended and fined more than the $10,500 that she has already been fined. Last night, during the final between Caroline Wozniacki and Kim Clijsters, Carillo went out of her way to point out how pretty Woznicki’s smile is and what a relief it is not to see unpleasantness [like Serena’s tirade] on the court.

I say this:

1-If you are scared of being berated, don’t be a ref. 

2-If I want to see a blonde girly-girl smiling, I’ll watch the Miss USA pageant.  I would rather watch the intensity of Serena’s play ANY DAY, than watch someone SMILE during match play. These are ATHLETES, not beauty pageant contestants. 

3-If the ref hadn’t called the foot-fault, which was NOT an obvious call, Serena would have had the chance to come back and win.  She may not have won, but the call was misplaced/misguided.  It’s a shame that she blew up, but she had ample provocation.

4-Serena doesn’t murder dogs like some other athletes. Give the woman a fucking break.

I would be curious to hear someone’s opinion (like Mr. Spy), who knows more about the penalties in other sports.

Ou est ma piscine?

It’s rainy and it’s 9/11, but since I haven’t gotten here in a week, let’s discuss other things. After a week of upheaval, I seem to have a medical provider I like, so I have some energy to devote elsewhere. I’ve been trying to swim a lot lately—it feels good though I am much slower than I was 3 months ago.

On Saturday I went back to Red Hook when they opened, at 11AM, for a swim. Soon after I got there, I was ask to swim circles (stay to my right at all times) and I agreed with the proviso that I not be responsible to enforce the rule. Then the woman next to me tried to get the woman in the lane next to her to swim circles. Asking someone to do this is a rhetorical question—it is something that is often a mandated rule and should be done out of consideration for other swimmers.

Woman on Deck: Can we swim circles?

Woman in Pool: Non, ehhh….

Us: [Staring open-mouthed]

WiP/Ms. La Pew: Non, becose if we swim in ze circles it will be too fast and I will ‘ave to rowsh and I worry becose I am pregnant. [She then started swimming in the middle of her lane.]

WoD to us: Well, I am NOT going to argue with a pregnant French woman.

Much grousing ensued. All I can say is that I have been swimming for 35 years and I have never been kicked in the belly. I have been kicked in the foot, in the leg, maybe in the hipbone during an open-water swim, but never in the stomach.

I can also say that karma is a bitch because I saw the French Lady on Monday and there was no special pregnant-lady lane for her to swim in. I saw her go to whine to one of the lifeguards [good luck with that, sweetie] and then I didn’t see her again. HA HA!

Go round and round

Tuesday I had my first appointment with the midwife–as some of you know, I am 14 (almost 15) weeks pregnant.  After the appointment, I went to swim at the public pool since it will close at 3PM on Labor Day and I want to get a few more free swims in before they close it up.

The problem with going to the Red Hook Pool during rush hour is that the only public transit that goes there is the B77 bus.  So of course the bus is mobbed with freaks and assholes.  (My mother is terrified to think that one day I might be talking to her grandchild with this mouth of mine.)  Many of these morons are going to Ikea.  When the bus stops at the pool stop I say “excuse me,” to one of the assholes and people shift slightly but nobody moves.  So I start pushing through the crowd and some schmuck says in a patronizing tone, “it’s OK, don’t worry–the bus won’t leave while you’re getting off.”

Don’t worry?!  How about step off the bus and move the fuck out of my way Mr. Patronizing-tourist-going-to-Ikea.  It was all I could do to tell him to shove his pathetic advice up his ass and go back to Spain. Or at least GETOUTOFMYWAY! That’s how we do it here in Amurrica, bitch.

But wait, there’s more. After the swim, I got back on the bus and was leaning against the wall near the driver.  A woman come from the back of the bus, “DRIVER!  DRIVER!  There’s a man back there and he has this rolled up dollar bill and he’s just snorting cocaine IN FRONT OF EVERYONE!!”

We had been waiting at a traffic light for a minute, but the driver got so distracted that he forgot to turn and we waited for ANOTHER minute at that light while the woman yelled more about cocaine-man, who apparently stopped snorting one he realized that he was the subject of controversy.  I began to think that I might get home. 

At the next stop, some guy knocked on the door to the bus as we were pulling away and begged the driver to let him on without paying.  We stood at the stop for 5 minutes while the driver told him, “Pay yo’ fare,” and the guy tried to explain that he DID have a transfer, but some girl needed it and couldn’t he just get a ride for a few blocks?  I began to think that I would NEVER get home.

I really hope to get another 2 swims under my elastic belt this weekend. But if I have another over-exciting bus ride, it might be that one is all I can take.  When Mr. Advil is no longer permitted in your life, the B77 becomes an even BIGGER headache than ever.  And who needs more headaches?

Class

In addition to making soup this weekend (see last entry), I also watched three DVDs.  I saw Duplicity (eh); Synecdoche, NY (note to self: no more Charlie Kaufman movies ever, please!) and The Class/Entre les Murs. 

The Class was one of the enjoyable movies I have EVER seen.  An additonal bonus is that although my French is abysmal, the French in this movie is relatively simple and I could understand about half of it without subtitles (I did keep the titles on). 

This sole purpose of this entry is to tell you peoples to go rent this movie/put it in your Netflix queue.  It’s a funny and sad movie with lots of talk by smart, funny, lippy, immigrant teens in Paris. What’s not to like?

Soupy

 A few weeks ago, my friend L gave me this cookbook.  The cookbook has lots of good stews and soups and since the weather had gotten, and will continue to get slightly cooler, I decided to do some cooking this weekend for the first time since Spring.

Yesterday I made Turkish Yogurt soup, which is basically chicken soup with yogurt and egg whisked in.  The soup came out well, though next time I will cook the farro longer, make the chicken stock stronger, and add more yogurt for a thicker soup.  The recommendation of the recipe was to use a whole Farmer’s Market chicken…but next time I will use organic thighs as I normally do.  The soup will be better.  The recipe calls for serving the soup with fresh mint on top…and I thought that was overpowering and nasty, though I usually like mint.  I picked the mint garnish off last night.

Now I’m making Meditteranean Bean Soup with cranberry beans.  L bought me this book because she was giving me all of her beans, which she bought from a “special” bean store, after discovering that her intestines will no longer tolerate beans.  I am hoping this soup comes out decently–I omitted the bay leaves from the recipe because I don’t have any and because I’m not a big bay leaf fan.  I’m not sure that I’ve ever had cranberry beans before.

Next up, in a couple of weeks (or maybe after Rosh Hashanah in 3 weeks), will probably be one of the chickpea soups as there appear to be a lot of chickpeas in the bag of beans that L gave me.

I have not done much cleaning this weekend, but have done good amounts of shopping, cooking and cat-sitting.  In addition to tending the bean soup, I really really wish I could have a nap right now. I keep reminding myself that a nap right now will mean very little sleep tonight and a very tough day at work tomorrow. Let’s hope I listen to myself.